Mary and Margarita Gonzalez (daughters of Pioneer Frances Nieves de Gonzalez) ~ Our mother Frances Nieves de Gonzalez was born in New Jersey, December 11, 1929. She as an only child, who, in her own words, "always knew she wanted many, many children of her own". She married at 19 years of age to Jesse H. Gonzalez. She had 9 pregnancies, 1 miscarriage, 8 children, 6 boys and 2 girls. Two of her boys died. Tommy at 11 months and Joseph "Joey" at 25 years of age.
Although she tried, she always regrets not having enough information and encouragement to have breastfed her first children: Bobby, Tommy, Michael, and Mary. However, once she started to seek information, my mother slowly began to breastfed the rest of her children: Joey, Jesse, Peter and Margaret (the latter two for more than 4 or 5 years.) She believed so much in the power and benefits (not only for baby but for mother as well) of breastfeeding that she always said "If I could do everything all over again, I wouldn't change a thing, except that I would breastfeed ALL my children."
She was a woman with a vision who was not afraid of going against the modern trend of the time which was, of course, the bottle fed child. She believed that breastfeeding was liberating and in no way diminished the power of women.
She believed so much that breastfeeding was the right choice, she and Patricia Fernos, another fearless woman, founded La Liga de al Leche in Puerto Rico. I remember the meetings at home. We lived in a two story house in Villa Borinquen, Puerto Rico. A very spacious house with a big carport and a back and a side terrace. Our house stands (and is still) next to the neighborhood basketball court. When she held the LLL meetings at home (whcih for many years was every month,) the house would burst with all these women who gathered with their babies and toddlers to talk about their experiencies. They would share happy moments, frustrations, they would give each other encouragment. All the while the very energetic babies and toddlers (which, by the way, had a mind and will of their own) would be crawling/running (and sometimes, if luck had it, sleeping) happily all around the house. For me, a tween at the time, the crowd was too loud; for my mom, there was no commontion whats' so ever, for her it was music to her ears. My mom's face would always be lit with joy whenever she held the LLL meetings at home.
She LOVED being a LLL leader. She cherished the phone calls (no matter how early in the morning or late in the evening) of desperate moms worried their babies weren't latching, or weren't getting "enough" milk. Or that their breasts were hard as rock or infected. Many called in tears and on the verge of quitting. All seeking confort.
My mom, very patiently, with a firm soothing voice, would reassure them, guide them, and at the end, appeased and energized them, giving every mom a hope to carry on. My mom also had a great sense of humor. Her laughter was contagious and was a balm for those in pain.
A very humble woman, my mom never seeked the spotlight. Whenever a TV show or newspaper reporter were doing a piece about La Liga de la Leche, she would ask someone else, usually Patricia, to do the pitch. She only went to these sort of events as a last resort,
My mom guided all my sister in laws during their breastfeeding experiences. And when my time was up, she was there to help me as well. Always giving sound advice, never imposing her beliefs.
Both my sister and myself breastfed all our kids. I have two boys, whom I breastfeed 5 and 6 years, respectively. My sister has four boys, all successfully breastfed, as well.
My mom's legacy lives on. Her grandaughter, Hannah, gave birth to a son, two years ago, and she still breastfeed him.
We are very grateful, as many women in Puerto Rico, for her wisdom and patience.
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Frances de Gonzalez |
Early LLL meeting in Puerto Rico |